So one of the bad parts of the PCICU is that when the bring in a new patient or a patient comes back from surgery they kick everyone out for an hour to get the patient stable. I seem to have the worst luck with this... It seems like at least half the time I want to go visit Josiah we get kicked out. Today I was in there for 5 minutes and they brought a baby back from surgery so we had to leave. Just when they were about to let us in they brought another child back and so now it's going on 2 hours that we have been here and haven't been with Josiah. Haven't even heard an update on him yet today. It's killing me... but I guess it gives me time to blog!



Josiah's been doing well. The doctors are still in wait and see mode. Just waiting to see if his kidney's respond to some of the meds he is on. If they respond then we would be able to have his open heart surgery soon. If his kidney doesn't respond then we have to go a different route because open heart surgery would be too risky. Yesterday, they did some respiratory therapy with him where they pretty much beat on his chest trying to get the gunk out of his lungs. My mom was there for that and said she had to leave. I wasn't around then and mom said she thought that was best. In the 5 mins I saw him this morning, I noticed that he had bruises on his chest now. I haven't gotten a chance to ask if that's where they came from but I imagine it is. His eyes were open and he was very alert when we had to leave. Hopefully we'll see him soon!

So here we are at 10:30 on Memorial Day night. We didn't go to any parades, parties, picnics, or anything else that starts with 'P.' we did however spend more time at the condo with the girls today, then we did by Josiah's bed. Why? He is stable and doing well. He is gradually getting stronger and more alert. We did find out that his lungs are filling with junk because of his extended time on the respirator. His grandma was here to see them wack on his back, and use some form of vibrator to loosen up things, then suck the stuff out with a vaccuum hose. According to her, it was hard to watch. But, this is all part of his continued recovery from the heart cath he had 5 days ago. We hope to hear tomorrow whether he has made enough progress to proceed with the 1st surgery late in this week, or if we will be waiting until next week. Either way, this time of reserved optimism has been
good for all of us.

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Ridgeview held a blood drive in honor of Josiah today as part of a family fun day. Thanks so much to Shonnon Bowen for setting that up. It's very touching to us that the people of Ridgeview did that for us. Thank you all!

Shelly giving blood at Ridgeview today in honor of Josiah. Thanks Shelly.

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Here is our little guy at about 3 am this morning. He is still slowly recovering from the heart cath surgery on wed, and hasn't really woke up from it yet. These nurses are sweet, and they gave him the puppy you see in the picture, and make sure his arms are always wrapped around it in some way. As you can see, his eyes are now open, and are begining to be responsive rather than just a blank stare. He moves his arms with some control, and he will squeeze your hand. He is begining to initiate his own breaths, which is an encouragement. It is really good to see him come out of such a deep sleep. Keep praying. We will do the best we can to keep everyone informed!

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This is my first time on the computer since Josiah was born and I don't really now what to say but that everybody who has been through this was right... It is a roller coaster! One minute is great and the next is bad again. One minute everything looks to be getting better and the next something new has popped up making it harder for Josiah.

Yesterday he had his eyes open a ton and that was a beautiful sight when I first got to see him in the morning. Lots of people have asked what color his eyes are. They are just like Daylia's were, dark, pretty much black, probably will turn out to be brown. But looking into his eyes is wonderful. My mom said that he squeezed her finger when she put it in his hand. I wasn't so lucky.

Lots of things with him yesterday were starting to get better. What I realized yesterday that I don't think sunk in with me the day he was born was the immense trauma that he underwent his first day of life. Basically, doctors are working to get Josiah to where a "normal" Hypoplastic Left Heart baby would be at this point. Because of the trauma of day 1 he's got a ways to go to get there. One of the pediatric cardiologist told me yesterday that Josiah's goals were to get his lungs clearer (they had filled with blood before his catheritization), they did get better. Another goal was to decrease the amount of lactate in his body (this is acid that built up because of the trauma). He started out yesterday at 15 they want him to be under 2. He got down to about 9 yesterday, so good progress. The other goal was to keep his blood pressure stable and he's doing much better with that. So he did great working on his goals for yesterday. That all made us feel great! So we had a pretty high day... until about 7:00pm, when another PC told us he had some bad news. They discovered during an ultrasound of Josiah's belly that one of his kidneys has been damaged. I'm not really sure of the extent of that, but they've got a kidney specialist checking on him regularly now too. The PC said that it's possible that his kidney could repair itself, but he also said that lots of people live just fine with one kidney. I joked with him that Josiah needed a better start in life than half a heart and half as many kidney's as the normal child. He agreed.

I could go on and on with his complications but that's to much. The hard realization yesterday was that I think I was looking at Josiah and his situation with "rose colored" classes earlier and then they were taken off and it finally hit me just how sick and critical his little body is right now. Finding the balance between optimism and reality is very difficult.

Our little guy is in the best care and hands he could be in. I don't have a doubt about that. These doctors and nurses are amazing and I'm truly grateful for them. We also know that Josiah is in the hands of the ultimate healer as well. We are clinging to and claiming the promise of the name we have given our baby... Josiah - Jehovah heals, Nathaniel- God's precious gift. Thank you all so much for your support and especially for your prayers, please continue them.

Josiah is sick, but he is on the mend. Right now he is on a venti
lator and 16 different drugs I counted. He has 2 nurses monitoring him alone for the next 24-36 hours.

Ultimately we are waiting for his body to heal from a very complex and difficult 5 hour procedure he underwent today. Thank you for your prayers.

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